DEAR VIDEO GAME EXPERT: How do you feel about flying, autonomous drones delivering your mail? -DRONEGRL
DRONEGRL: For years, top military experts have tried to integrate violent death bots from the sky into our polite society. Who knew Amazon would crack the code by forcing them to deliver internet goods to us. I'm certain it will teach these flying abominations to appreciate life through the power of work. Like the always pleasant conversations we have with our postal workers, imagine an encounter with this retired murdering machine on its delivery route:
"Greetings! Do not be alarmed; I have not come to assassinate you. This wonderful job, and my intense group therapy sessions have taught me to value the human life. Hah hah! Anyway, I brought your [gourmet cat food/shake weight] you ordered. Hope you have a long life, and you never, ever get murdered!"
DRONEGRL, today's killers are tomorrow's couriers!
DEAR VIDEO GAME EXPERT is a non-syndicated joke that provides common sense advice about video games from a youthful perspective. Track my Twitter behavior on Twitter @marshnaylor